That right there is a sign how much porn has reconfigured even the basics of sex.The World Wide Web of money shots has produced an unholy number of guys my age who think or maybe even know better but can't really help themselves because it's the stuff their penises were raised on, that coming a woman is a totally normal thing to do. Before you even know her parents' names or her college major or what she wanted to be when she grew up (a Wookie! As if it's just the standard end to the sex act.
But we'd managed to get the condom on, the penis in, and a nice back-and-forth rhythm going. It was like I'd wandered onto the set of an X-rated movie called Unfortunately he was not the first nondermatologist to offer a fourth-date facial. Splashing around in my pool of suitors are a bunch of dudes who have been yanking their flotation noodles to online porn since the dawn of dial-up.
This kind of scene was once what you streamed when no human lady was available to mash genitals.
Porn used to be the poor man's substitute for sex; now the latter has to be gussied up with facials and ball gags and D-grade dialogue to be even half as enticing as porn.
"—and the first time we had sex, he pulled out a ball gag from his nightstand and gingerly placed it next to me on the bed.
Maybe these guys just don't understand the boundaries of online fantasy.